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Sometimes, I really, really love studying history. We’ve delving a lot into primary sources, and I’ve discovered that primary sources are where it’s at, in terms of finding hilarity. I tend to define “hilarity” as “something not boring” though.

I have to find a newspaper article on my historical topic and analyze it, using methods that I don’t know. Right now I’m just finding newspaper articles. I have the how-to-analyze at home. I’ve found two decent articles, so I’ve decided I’m done with Step 2, but I…I couldn’t resist clicking on a third. For fun.

I will have to recreate the AMAZINGNESS that is this article.

New York Times
Sept. 21, 1911

Stover Plowing Up the Park Lawns

Going to Turn Over Fifty Acres, He Says, Which May Be Turf Again in Two Years:

Defiant of All Protests

“I’m Park Commissioner,” He Asserts, Adding That His Critics Are Ignorant of Soil Restoration.

OH SNAP, CRITICS, ARE YOU GOING TO TAKE THAT? HE JUST CALLED YOU IGNORANT.

…Mr. Stover, however, contends that he is acting on the recommendation of a Government agricultural expert who recently examined the park soil, and that of the Park. Those who opposed the policy as the only means of effectively destroying real grass to the neglected areas of the park. Those who opposed the policy, he declared, were “ignorant persons who do not know what they were talking about.”

ignorant

As for him, he was a Park Commissioner and was going to save the Park lawns after his own fashion…

park commissioner

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