Archive for the ‘mylov’ Tag

Vampire Party: part 1   Leave a comment

NOTE: this was mostly inspired by tumblr

Mylov enters from a hard day of work, wearing a coat, scarf, and boots, absolutely exhausted. I don’t know what work Mylov does but it’s enough to cover a good car insurance plan, and has a lenient enough dress code to allow Mylov to wear a scarf at all times.

Mylov collapses on the couch, sighing. After a moment, Mylov starts struggling out of the coat and boots.

A dramatic, vampire-y sting. Draven enters, wearing bat-themed pajamas, yawning and stretching.

Draven: Good evening.

Mylov sighs.

Draven begins picking up the boots and shoes.

Draven (tsk-ing): Such a mess my love leaves! We must be in preparation for our guests tonight!

Mylov gives Draven a look.

Draven: Did my love forget? Tonight is the Summoning! We will have many guests over for dinner tonight!

Mylov sighs.

Draven: What should we prepare for them?
Mylov: Italian.
Draven: My love, what is wrong? I haven’t done anything wrong. What could possibly be wrong?

Mylov sighs.

A knock on the door.

Draven: Our guests have arrived and I am not yet prepared! Seduce them with your wiles, my love.

Draven exits. Mylov reluctantly gets up and opens the door. On the other side are Nasia, Lucy, Cain, and Dmitri.

Lucy: Mylov! It is good to see you.
Nasia: We are here for the Summoning.
Cain: We were pleased to find your excellent dwelling!
Dmitri: And now we stand. At the door.
Nasia: We have many things planned.
Cain: Inside of your cozy home.
Lucy: We need to get started.

Mylov sighs.

Mylov: Please enter.

Now that they have been invited, the vampires enter the house, all saying “Good evening” as they enter. They start making themselves more at home.

Lucy: This is my first Summoning, does anyone know how to start?
Nasia: The word is initiate.
Lucy: Does anyone know how to initiate?
Dmitri: No one does, but I brought a book.

It’s the Necronomicon.

Nasia: Where did you find this book? There’s only five in existence.
Dmitri: I had a fellowship at Arkham University in a, shall we say, previous life.
Nasia: Last I heard of anyone even trying to take that off the grounds was Wilbur Whateley way back in 1926.
Dmitri: I have a little more pull than a bumpkin from Dunwich.
Cain: Can we get started?
Dmitri: Are we all assembled? We need five points for this pentagram. Where is our fifth?

Draven enters, dressed in much more dignified clothing.

Draven: Good evening, my friends.
Other Vampires: Good evening, Draven.
Dmitri: Then let us begin.

As Draven speaks, Dmitri arranges the other vampires just so, lights candles or draws with chalk or whatever.

Draven: My friends, let us not forget our purpose. Tonight we summon the power we need to avenge ourselves. For too long have the humans forgotten us and our power. Every day they find new ways to mock us, belittle us, objectifying and sexualizing us in their printed media and moving pictures. Tonight we say…no more! Awaken the dark powers!
Dmitri: Animi, clamorem meum audete! Altere parte te voco! Veni meo!
Vampires: Animi, veni! Anime, veni! Animi, veni! Animi, veni! (and so on)

Dramatic lights and music. The lights turn red, and a Demon appears. Well, maybe it’s a demon. It’s rather formless (covered with layers of cloth)

The Demon roars.

Nasia: We must feed the demon for it to take its shape!
Draven: My love, my love, come here!

Mylov is reluctantly pulled into the circle.

Mylov (sings): Like a good neighbor, State Farm is there.

A car insurance agent appears. The Demon eats the car insurance agent. A layer of cloth is lost – the Demon is taking shape!

Draven cackles.

Draven: Again, my love!
Mylov (sings): Like a good neighbor, State Farm is there.

Another car insurance agent. The Demon again eats the agent. Another layer of cloth is lost. Draven again cackles.

Draven: Again!
Mylov (sings): Like a good neighbor, State Farm is there.

A car insurance agent appears.

Agent: In the Vatican!

The light turns blue, and the insurance agent pulls the Demon offstage. Loud Latin chanting. The Demon screams, and is suddenly cut off.

The lights return to normal.

Lucy: So…now what?

Posted April 9, 2015 by agentksilver in writing

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